'My Woman'

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Hello guys,I have been seeing this joke around for a while(don't even know what to call it,that's why I am referring to it as a joke).
RULES FOR MY FUTURE WOMAN 1. My woman is NOT allo
wed to laugh at other peoples jokes even via social media...She has to send me the joke first and then we decide if it's funny or not so we can laugh together.2. My Woman isn't allowed to sneeze in public...NOneed to say "bless you." She'salready blessed, she has me.3. My Woman isn't allowed to have candles on her birthday cake...WTF are you wishing for? All your dreams came true when you met me.4. My Woman isn't allowed to defend another man when I'm talkin about him. If I say hes an asshole, hesan ass...hole !. Say it with me,"HE IS AN ASSHOLE!!5. My Woman isn't allowed to laugh at another man's jokes when Im not around... She better calls me and we'll decide together if its funny or not.6. My Woman isn't allowed to have more than 3men I̶̲̥̅̊n̶̲̥̅̊ her life. Me, ur father & ur brother. If you got two brothers, pick your favorite one7. My Woman isn't allowed to speak to other men onthe phone. If she calls 180 or any customer service line and a man answers, she better hangs up& try again.8. My Woman is not allowed to spray PERFUME inpublic. I've seen the commercials. Those niggas comeout of no where.9. My Woman isn't allowed to talk to other men whileI'm asleep. You're not tired? Wanna talk to somebody? Say a prayer & get to know a bit more about God.10. My Woman isn't allowed to pray silently. I want toknow what you & God are up to. You might be praying to get another man.11. My Woman is not allowed to take a jog around the house, What is she trying to do? Practice how she'll run away from me? I don't think so.12. My Woman isn't allowed to touch another man. Ifyou wanna touch him, you poke dat nigga with a stick!13. My Woman isn't allowed to go out with her girls,she might turn lesbian and leave me..I DO this to protect my woman because I love Her!!!
Seriously?!Like a guy sat down to write all these crap?That's horrible,We are human beings not charlatans.
To my first paragraph about this being a joke,I really do believe it because I don think this is real.
But this world eh,m sure the above perfectly describes some men.God'll help the women tho.

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